RESTART

This is a new week, the last few Mondays seem to start out like this for me, it is when I get to the weekend that everything seems to be forgotten. But right now, I have hit the re-set button and I am moving into a new day, a new week, committed once again to myself. It's all I can do at this point.

I have done my best through exercise this morning to "purge" my body of the harm from the weekend. But I am going to resist the urge to starve myself and restart this week with nourishment and things that are good for me. I am going to go back on my diet plan, the one that I started on back in the summer. I have never really acknowledged stopping it because I follow it for about 5-6 days of the week for the last 5 weeks or so (come to think of it, nowhere in my diet plan does it say to eat yourself into a sugar coma until you feel sick), but this week I am making the commitment to myself to follow it through for a solid 7 consecutive days. This will not be easy as I have a dinner meeting this evening and plans to go out with the girls on the weekend.

The good thing about busying myself with commitments is that being around others I won't have the opportunity to binge by myself, and Saturday seeming to be the day I need to make an extra effort to resist the temptations. I never want to feel like I felt yesterday and Saturday - both physically and emotionally. This is just so emotionally draining, the ups and downs.

So there it is: My goal for the week is to see through the week without binging, 7 consecutive days. I hope to achieve this through setting daily meal plans for myself and sticking to them. These will include small daily treats for myself so I do not feel like I am restricting myself. (You may think that by compulsively planning what I will eat in the course of a day is a controlling process, but this is how I do things and it works for me - I am a "list" person so to speak, at work/school, lists keep me on task and focused, so while this may not seem like a good idea for some people, this is what will work for me.) And who knows, maybe from there I can make it another 7 days. But baby steps for now - one day at a time.

*N